This afternoon, Sajid and I were sitting in the room adjacent to the living room (some might call it a dining room, but I don't because dining rooms are stuffy. I prefer to think of it as the eating nook.), when we heard a woman on the T.V. say this:
"Do you think Maddox never smiles for the camera because he's sick of the Paparazzi or because he was forced to get a Mohawk??!!"
Sajid: Who is Maddox?
Me: Angelina Jolie's adopted son.
Sajid: Oh, the Japanese kid?
Me: I think he's from Cambodia.
Me again: I don't know what recess of my brain I pulled that information from.
But I do. I do know. The woman who made the comment was in a commercial on the channel serving as the playground of my most shameful guilty pleasure. The guilty pleasure is soaking in 1/2 hours' worth of inane chatter set to images of famous people; the playground is the E! Network.
There. I said it.
I think of it this way. I don't watch much T.V. When I do, I might as well do it right. I mean, why pretend there are shows that are "good for you" or "intelligent?" Ok, the occasional show on the History Channel, Discovery Channel, or PBS might be good for you or intelligent. But I mean, I listen to informative talk radio, I read books. Why not let the T.V. be the place to really just let my mind turn to mushy goo for a while?
I don't really feel that way about it. I truly do feel guilty every time I watch anything on E! The lamest part about it is that I don't even know who half the stars are or what they're famous for. I have seen many many images of Eva Longoria and heard a fair bit of commentary on her, and I have no idea what she does. Actress? Model? Singer?
Here's the loop:
Do you see me in it anywhere?
And yet, and yet. I know who Maddox is and where he's from. I stop short at caring, but I do know. What to make of this?
I think what I like most about pictures of stars is seeing what they're wearing. There's a dress shop in the Pruneyard shopping center that often has beautiful gowns in the window. I've walked by that window so many times and thought, 'now if I only had an upcoming red carpet event to attend.' But alas, even if I had an event, the carpet would likely be closer to the shag variety. Famous people get to dress up all the time. The whole 9, all the time! They probably get sick of it, but still.
As nice to look at as the gowns are, what I really marvel at is the pants that famous women wear. So many of the woman are of amazon height like me, but miraculously, their pants are always, always long enough; they can even wear heels and their pants are still long enough.
I told Sajid that if I were rich, I wouldn't buy a big house or a crazy car or bling. No, my big indulgence would be a personal tailor who crafted special pants just for me. They would be long long long, big enough in the hips and tight enough in the waist. And they wouldn't have the mega long crotch that most "tall" length pants do. Hey! I said I was tall, not long-crotched. What is that about?!
While I'm on the subject, I did find a decent pair of jeans after an intense search that lasted weeks. Recently, my friend Nicole sent me the link to a website her honey Raul had worked on. Zafu is a site solely devoted to helping women find the right pair of jeans. I tried it out, plugged in all my stats, and like magic, the website brought up about 20 pairs of jeans in all prices ranges. The pair I had found on my own after the exhaustive search was among them. Gals, save your precious crude oil derivative and check it out!
Well, we're a long way from where this started (refugee children from Cambodia, to refresh your memory), but that's what put the blah in blogging right?
Yeah. What he said.